namespace Tuttle
{
    class Kate
    {
        float m_energy;

        private void setLocation(object sender, LocationArgs e)
        {
            if (e.Location is LocationTypes.Sleeping)
            {
                float energy_expended = 0.0;

                while (m_energy >= 0)
                {
                    this.Vocal(VocalTypes.Scream, VolumeLevels.Max, TimeSpan.FromMinutes(1.0), null, energy_expended);
                    m_energy -= energy_expended;
                }
            }
        }        
    }
}

Seriously, there should be a law against it. I remember very clearly the sense of dread that accompanied the first sight of "Back to School" sales and it seems like they start earlier every year. Early July is just cruel, heck in my early days of elementary school, we didn't even get OUT of school until late June or so.

Natalie and Kate dancing with joy this morning. They're always very happy when it's time to get up

Just as an aside, I'd like to register my annoyance that Google Video has shut down but YouTube (its replacement) hasn't yet picked up any of its features - mainly opting out of search results. Hopefully it's coming at some point.

Ever wondered what it's like when twins go down for a nap? Here's an abridged version of the (by no means atypical) 45 minutes it took them to go down for their afternoon nap today.

Finally, finally (finally) got the girls' first birthday video uploaded and working.  Please to enjoy.

We took the girls (and their cousins) to see the Easter Bunny at the mall today.  I don't know, the girls seem to enjoy it and it's nice to have the pictures, but the prices... I'm sure it's reasonable it's just kind of galling to pay that much for pictures I could easily print out myself.  It's kind of like paying someone to burn a CD for you.

Also, the CD they provide is technical laziness at its finest.  It has a little VB6 app on it to display notices, popup/print HTML licenses, etc.  Fine, whatever, if you need that kind of thing.  It's also understandable to launch some kind of splash screen as an autorun on the CD - even to the point of running the program - though that's pushing it.  But this CD actually runs a batch file for the autorun that installs a set of VB6 DLLs without permission.  It's the very first thing it does, before asking you or displaying anything on the screen, that's what it does - as soon as you put the CD in.

I know, how can it run a program to ask you if you want to install the files without installing the necessary DLLs first?  Lots of ways.  Lots of easy, considerate ways that don't abuse the customer's trust.  So what's the big deal?  Well, despite the danger present when any program runs against your will, without you knowing, there's the possible fact that you may have newer versions of these DLLs that would be invalidated and overwritten by the older versions - breaking existing software.  Or, in my case, since I do development in VB6 from time to time, it messes up my code libraries, causing duplicate registrations and, in general, making a mess of my development environment.

Or that was the scene at Christmastime, anyway.  This time I had autorun firmly disabled.

Anyway, enjoy the bunny picture.

Since it's warming up again, the girls got to try out their new wagon today:

Ok, so enough with the politics for tonight, just the same old crap there anyway.  I finally remembered to grab a USB cable before sitting down to dump the pictures that I've been meaning to share off of my phone.  So, with no further ado...

I forget where we were driving when we saw this truck but I had to ask Leesa to grab a picture of it.  It's kind of hard to tell but the back of the truck says, inexplicably, "WE BUY YONK CARS".  I figured it was supposed to be junk, and I guess I could see misspelling it as "YUNK" or "JONK", but "YONK"? Yeah, it's on the side too - same spelling. This is Kate chilling in the Target cart as we did some Christmas shopping.  If memory serves it was one of the first times (if not the first) that they got to ride in the cart without being in a carseat. Natalie desperately trying to get to a bag of Krystal's burgers.  This is from November, long before she got any teeth. Now we enter the time when I was at the mall, unattended, and decided to just take pictures of whatever absurd thing I happened to come across.  The above I have little to add to.  It basically speaks for itself.  It was just in the window of an "As Seen on TV" store.  More from that store shortly. This is from a kiosk in the mall that sells "electric cigarettes".  I think the idea is that you can look just as cool as if you had a regular cigarette but it's a lot healthier.  I don't know, somehow it just looks really stupid to me.  It looks like she's falling while holding a cheap pen in her mouth. Wow, it's clearly a Wii!  And for only $25.  See?  It has the Wiimotes and nunchucks and such!  It has bowling, tennis, baseball, boxing, and golf!  The kids are going to be thrilled come Christmas morning! Back to the "As Seen on TV" store.  Never seen this on TV, but as you'll soon see, it's just possible that this Notebook Holder comes to us from another country.  Maybe. "Can be convoluted"! "Be easy to catch the screen.  Be hard to tired for the hands.  Good posture." "7 angle points can be adjusted among 10' and 16'" Here's the back of the box with all of the technical information. "The loss and damage of the data saved in the computer exceeds our guaranty." "No using beyond the purpose." "Please set on the balanced table to use." "Adjusting to the stable and fixed angle, placing the notebook after assurance." "Don't jam the finger if the angle is altered and adjusted." "Don't adjust the angle when placing the notebook." "Please shopping using when the notebook isn't fixed stably." "Please pay attention to the unassured situations because of the underside shape of the notebook." "Don'open the screen excessively to avoid possible falling." "Please rotate the holder slowly to avoid dropping the notebook." "Don't drop and strike intensively, for it is possible to cause damage." "Don't set beside the fire." "Long-time placing is prohibited." "Don't use in the airflow and dusty circumstance." "Please wipe gently with dry or soft cloth.  Don't use the gasoline, thinner or alcohol." "Heat dispersion effect: Make sure the air isflowing to create the comfortable life rhythm of the notebook!  Perfec heat dispersion when enjoying DVD" "Skidding prevemted: Be unaware of cutting of the electricity at any time for good heat dispersion."  [What?] Here's a "Figure Trimmer" that's a triple-threat of nonsense.  It promises to help you lose weight by pivoting (so you can exercise with it, I guess) plus it has magnets that are all positioned to provide benefits via the magic of reflexology. Here's a closeup of the foot diagram that shows which points on the foot correspond to which internal organs.  I like how they are all roughly similar to the shape of the organs themselves.  Must be a real bitch to try to stab the small intestine spots what with them weaving all around like that. The back had more information on the benefits of the "Magnetic Wave Disc".  If you can't make it out, here's what it says: MAGNETIC WAVE According to a Japanese medical doctor, there exists a magnetic field inside the human body.  The electromagnetic force in the human body reduces accelerated activity of "sodium, postassium and phosphor", which in turn stimulates the activeness of the sympathetic nerve. BARE FEET AND HEALTH Since modern people are not used to walking bare feet, there are various diseases that affect the internal organs.  In view of this fact, the Magnetic Wave Disc was designed and produced.  The Magnetic Wave Disc will massage and stimulate the meridian points on the bottom of the feet and help promote good health. MAGNETIC WAVE DISC Stimulates more than 200 meridian points Alleviate pain Massages and relaxes Stimulates blood circulation The Magnetic Wave Disc will not cause any side effects with prolonged use. First I'd just like to point out how great it is that the claim is attributed to "a Japanese medical doctor."  Not even "Eastern medicine teaches us that...".  No.  "Some Japanese doctor once told us this." The merits of reflexology and magnets I'll leave to the reader to investigate; it's too late in the day for me to start a pseudoscience rant.  I would like to point out, though, that not walking around in bare feet all the time has probably done wonders for lowering tetanus infections at the very least. My nephew from our recent trip to Savannah.  He tried to wear ever piece of pirate regalia offered to kids at The Pirates' House.  He succeeded, briefly. Kate, looking very pitiful while wearing her nebulizer mask during her recent breathing troubles. Ingles has started carrying some really weird flavors of potato chips.  Target had some interesting ones under its generic brand a while back like "buffalo wings and blue cheese" that were pretty innovative for their time.  These are kind of gross, though. Thought this said "Ragin' Rash" at first. "Ranch" is better. And lastly, minced fish, deep fried with a layer of cheese. Mmmmm!

To young children, staying up late must seem like such an exciting adventure.  Well, the other night Natalie found out what thrilling things grownups do after she goes to bed and even got to join in.



Yes, she got to have a french fry and watch Wheel of Fortune.

The /babies.asp page will shortly be discontinued to allow for greater control over picture release and such.  Similarly, pictures, movies, and news/stories about them will from now on be almost exclusively posted to http://www.tuttleblog.com and not here.  Leesa will mostly be managing the content there; go ahead and take a look, I've just posted their picture with Santa.

Just a quick follow up.  After all the excitement on Friday, Kate was pretty exhausted on Saturday morning, even after a good nine or so hours of sleep.  So she got in a nap while we got ready to take her to see the doctor again.


In the end, removing the eye patch was the most traumatic part, I think.  I wanted to ensure that she couldn't pull a piece of the tape or gauze off and choke on it so it may have been a little, well, extra secure.  In my defense, though, she did have the same number of eyebrows after removing the patch that she did when it went on.

We got in pretty quickly to see the doctor.  I didn't think they were open on Saturday; they might have been open just to get caught up with one doctor out, I guess.  He didn't see the scratch at first so he put dye in her eye again.  After a moment he flipped the lights off, and pronounced her eye "perfect".  Which, of course, we knew already.  She even forgave the doctor before we left, grabbing his cheek to show she's still friends.  Or maybe as a warning - you can't really tell with that one...

She hasn't yet shown the signs of any other problems in that eye so it seems to have indeed healed overnight.  She was pretty worn out by the whole thing afterwards, though...


But after a nap she was back to her old self:

We were in Athens this afternoon and had to stop by Target, as is our habit.  For some reason we do tend to tear through the diapers and formula and they have both for cheap (though not in plenty this time, for some reason).  As a total coincidence it's also a convenient place to acquire the latest World of Warcraft expansion.  Of course, they were out of those too, which doesn't make any sense, but that's for another time.

It was a usual trip, each of us taking a cart with a baby in it.  Both of them were irritable in that we interrupted a nap but being general good sports about the trip.  After getting back to the car with our baby stuff and some Panda goodness, I noticed that Kate had three big tears running down her face.  She'd been crying but this was a lot for her.  Her eye was also red and a little puffy and the tears just kept coming.  We called the doctor, being in Athens already anyway, and they said they could work us in if we came in right away.

The pediatrician's office is always a special kind of challenge with twins.  We have to keep them settled, happy, and above all not touching anything!  All while people just stare and ask stupid questions.  Today we even got a couple "THIS one is the X, and THAT one is the Y", which occupies a special dark spot in my heart.  But 1.5 hours or so later we were seeing a doctor - the girls' regular doctor being out today.  By this time her eye had gone back to normal and she wasn't crying so we figured it had resolved itself.  But he took a look and saw something in there still.  He tried a sodden cotton ball, special dyes, even holding her head under the faucet - something particularly alarming to me.  But nothing.

Meanwhile Kate is making deafening sounds that bore directly into my hindbrain, but there was nothing I could do.  Eventually he decides it's not an object but a scratch - since it's not moving.  He sends us home with some gauze and a prescription for some ointment we're to marinate her cornea in overnight.  So it's 30 minutes to get the prescription filled and by this time both girls are hungry, tired, scared, and even hysterical.  The ride home with them screaming, at dark, in the rain, we won't speak of.  But we did eventually make it home safely.

And yet, the fun was just to begin.  If you've ever tried to slather an infant's eye with ointment, then tape gauze to it, all in a way that ensures she can't - in the middle of the night - tear off pieces and choke on them, or injure her eye, then you'll know.  Otherwise you'll have to use your imagination.  In the end it took a trip to CVS to get some reasonable-sized pieces of gauze and some stronger tape.  But she seems ok now.  She's sleeping now and given her day today she'll likely sleep soundly.


Oh, yes, we have to take her back to the doctor's tomorrow morning where we get to see the downside to using stronger tape...  Prayers are welcome, hopefully she'll endure another examination and it'll be gone.  Otherwise she's going to have to see an opthamologist tomorrow too.

6:45 PM	Leesa's home with the girls. I need to attend to dinner for a few more minutes so she's getting them changed into sleepers and ready for bed. The plan is to let them play some on the floor while we eat to get them nice and tired. Then give them a bottle until they're drowsy and send them to bed.
6:55 PM	Ok, that plan worked about as well as it always does. They're too tired to play. So it's bottle time. Lately I've gotten good at keeping dinner warm and sanitary for hours.
7:10 PM	Feeding them now - I have Kate. We're going to swaddle their legs at first just to keep them from constantly waking themselves up by kicking. They can still flip over if they need to, unlike if we did their arms too. Not that they can't flip over with their arms swaddled, but the concern is they'd only be able to do it once...
8:00 PM	Ok, the girls are fed and both asleep (guess that counts as "drowsy"). So here we go...
8:15 PM	The girls have been in their cribs for about 15 minutes now and they're quiet. Natalie stayed asleep for the most part when we put her down but Kate cried some.
9:00 PM	They've awakened a couple times but settled down after 5 minutes or so. Now they're both up and screaming like crazy. Leesa's going to go in the other room so she doesn't have to listen to it. This is probably the worst screaming I've ever heard out of them.
9:45 PM	Kate has fallen asleep but Natalie is still wide awake and screaming her head off. She is actually on her hands with her head up and sometimes even hitting the frame of the crib.
9:55 PM	Well, Natalie's been quiet for 5 minutes now. Maybe she's gone to sleep.
10:05 PM	Still quiet. Maybe I should go check and see if she's ok. They have the movement sensors in their cribs, but I had to turn her sensitivity up some since she kept moving away from the pad.
10:15 PM	Ok, I checked on them. They are both sound asleep on their bellies, looking very physically exhausted. We'll see how long that lasts.
10:20 PM	Leesa's gone to bed and I think I'll follow.
Sleeping (3 hours, 10 minutes)
1:30 AM	Awakened by crying. It's just Natalie - Kate's still asleep. I'm going to feed her and put her back.
2:00 AM	6 ounces later, Natalie's gone back to sleep. I laid her down and now she's crying again. I think. Problem is there's no way to tell which one is crying so I'm not sure when to feed Kate.
2:05 AM	The crying's stopped. Leesa's pretty sure she can tell who's crying and will tell me when it's Kate. I'm going back to bed.
Sleeping (1 hour, 55 minutes)
4:00 AM	More crying. Leesa says it's Kate. I make another bottle and go upstairs. Sure enough, she's right as always. Kate's diaper has leaked some so I change her sleeper and give her a new swaddle blanket for her legs.
4:25 AM	Kate's done eating and fallen asleep - as have I once or twice. There's either something wrong with our TV our the audio levels of the latest House episode because I can't understand half of what they're saying. Falling asleep may not help much either, I imagine.  Natalie's cried a few times over the last half hour but never more than 30 seconds or so. I've put Kate to bed and am now going myself.
Sleeping (2 hours, 5 minutes)
6:30 AM	Awakened by the alarm clock. The freaking alarm clock. That hasn't happened in a long time. One of the girls is fussing a little but not really crying.
6:35 AM	Upstairs now with today's clothes. Natalie has a leak again, so that's another swaddle blanket down. Definitely going to have to do a load of their laundry today.
6:45 AM	Downstairs with two dressed girls watching Backyardigans while Leesa gets ready to leave with them in about 15 minutes. All together a pretty painless process, actually. Total sleep time is 7 hours, 10 minutes, which is an incredible amount. I suspect some of our earlier failures were due to trying it on naps instead of actual night sleeps. Tonight, too, might present more challenges, but at least Leesa will be able to help more tonight since she works from home Fridays. Hopefully, though, they've gotten past the initial fear and they'll be sleeping easily in their rooms from now on.

After many false starts and struggles, tonight is the night that the girls begin sleeping in their own beds and not in their bassinets in our bedroom.

Last night, Natalie managed to turn around onto her belly while completely swaddled - arms too.  Then today Kate managed to flip over a bouncer (a what?) while she was inside it.  So it's no longer a matter of convenience, it's become unsafe for them to stay there.

So, yeah, probably a long few nights ahead of us because they don't like their beds and are just remarkably stubborn (for some reason).  But hopefully when we're done they'll be sleeping on their own, upstairs in their own beds, without the need for swaddle blanket, vibration device, white noise machine, blackout shades, and all the rest of the baby sleep-aids.  You know, hopefully anyway.

The title pretty much says it all.

  

Well, mostly Kate. Natalie was pretty tired. But there's more Natalie coming shortly.

 

Natalie, shortly after birth:

First, a primer:

There are two types of twins: fraternal and identical.  The differences are complete and absolute and have nothing to do with physical apperance.  Fraternal twins are created when more than one egg is present at fertilization - resulting in twins no more genetically similar than ordinary siblings.  Identical twins occur when an already fertilized egg splits into two distinct (you know, usually anyway) embryos.  These are (for all intents and purposes) genetically identical.  Of course you know all this but I thought I should get it out of the way first.

Having said that...

• Yes, they are identical.
• Yes, we're sure.  Really.  Really very sure.  I promise.
• No, it doesn't matter if they look the same.
• Yes, they are both girls - please see "genetically identical"
• Yes, we can tell them apart.  Well, usually, anyway.
• Really very sure.  Seriously, I saw the single placenta and everything.
  

Furthermore...

• Yes, they're twins.
• Yes, twins run in her family.
• It's really not as uncommon as you're making it out to be.
• Oh, really?  Your cousins?  Wow, small world.
  
• That's just really a rude question and fertility drugs cause fraternals not identicals.
• Yes, they're a double blessing.
• Yes, they're more work.
• Yes, I've thought about what college is going to cost.
• And the weddings, yes, them too.
  
• Yes, they are precious, thank you.
• They're about seven weeks old.
• Natalie and Kate.
• Thank you, we like the names too.
• 7 pounds, something, and 6 pounds, something.
• This one's Natalie, this one's Kate.
  
• Yes, I suppose they're smaller than other seven-week-olds you've seen.
• Yes, very tiny.
• Yes, they were early.
• Actually she's already lost the pregnancy weight.
• No, I don't want to hear about your labor.
• No, there's nothing "wrong" with them - they're just early.
• It's a monitor for Natalie's heartrate and breathing.
• She's fine - growing like a weed.
  
• No, you can't hold them.
• No, please don't touch them.
• No, even if they weren't immunodeficient I wouldn't let random strangers hold them.
• Please stop your kid from trying to touch them.
• Yes, indeed, very precious.
• No, this one's Natalie, this one's -- you know, what difference does it really make to you?
  
• They're dressed identically in pink outfits, in pink carseats - no, one's not a boy.
• Stop whispering "twins" and "two babies".  We hear you and they are not a sideshow attraction.
• We will not lower the shade or move the blanket so you can see better.
• Yes, I can tell you love babies.
  
• Seriously, I'm trying to eat here.  Keep walking.
• So... if you're just going to stand there and stare at them you really don't need me for that so I'm going to go back to eating
• Umm... are you done asking questions?  If so, keep it moving, we have a line to get through.

There, now all I have to do is format this into a FAQ sheet I can attach to their carseats and it'll save us all a lot of time.

Ok, Picasa's really getting on my nerves.  So unless I find another system that works I'm just going to host my own pictures.  It's just bare-bones right now (thumbnails - click to get the full image) but I'll add tags, etc. time permitting.

http://www.smilingkevin.com/babies.asp

Babies are here!  I don't have the energy right now (nor the grammatical skills, evidently) to do a whole thing about what's happened, but for those in search of pictures, your journey ends here:

 http://picasaweb.google.com/smilingkevin.com

Use caution in viewing the Delivery album.  There be blood.

Well, we've made it to 28 weeks as of yesterday.  Our girls would stand a pretty good chance of surviving without permanent problems now if they had to be delivered, though they would likely spend 4 - 6 weeks in an incubator.  So I'm happy to say that they are still safely with Leesa and growing more every day.  She hasn't had any other issues recently.

We did have to go to the hospital last Tuesday around 11p, which was fun.  She hadn't felt them move much for a couple days and the discharge slip from our last visit said that was something to watch for.  So we called her OB on call and she said to head for the hospital for some monitoring.  Which means we had a few hours of find-the-babies, with both of them becoming very lively indeed once they felt the monitors on them.

So we weren't real concerned about their lack of movement by the time we left since they hardly stopped moving the whole time and both had good, strong heartrates.

I'd like to momentarily call attention to the excellent nursing staff working at the new Family Birth Center at St. Mary's in Athens.  They are really exceptional - Angela, in particular.  Especially considering all of the challenges of constantly putting up with our hyper girls and taking care of easily-excitable new parents, it's wonderful how professional and still friendly they are.

That being said, I'd really like it if I only see all of them once more in my life.  You know, nothing personal, we just never go there just because we're bored and have little else to do.

Leesa has an appointment with her perineonatologist (hah, Firefox's spellcheck isn't even going to try) tomorrow where I'm hoping we get some more great ultrasound footage (maybe even the 3D (4D?) dealie) and she's hoping he'll say, "Your placenta is like the Rock of Gibraltar and you may feel free to decorate the nursery, take frequent trips to Target, and lift objects many times your own weight at will!"

Probably not, but hopefully she'll at least be cleared to go up the stairs once in a while or take short shopping trips.  I know it's killing her being stuck in the house all the time and not even able to come upstairs and see the nursery.

Leesa's been discharged and we're back home now.  She's been put on bed rest until delivery to try to prevent any further problems, but the doctor says that it's unlikely that we'd get a complete placental abruption -- which is my big fear.  Still, no reason we won't end up doing the very same thing later today or tomorrow.  But we know that God's watching over our little ones, no matter what.

It's a rough thing this father bit and I know it only gets harder.  It's a never-ending source of stress, fear, anxiety, and even terror -- to say nothing of the strain on sleep and finances.  Last night they refused to go to sleep and kept dodging and kicking the fetal monitors, turning what should have been an hour of observation into a night-long, sleepless marathon of find-the-baby.  I already have a long list of reasons to spank them once they finally get here and are big enough to know why.  Maybe I'll just make them wait until they're 18 to get their driver's license.

But, then again, we saw them on the ultrasound again today.  They were asleep (no wonder after last night).  Kate was lying sideways and Natalie was lying with her head resting on Kate's belly.  It was very cute.

So, you know, it's ok.  Whatever my little girls need. 

It started out as an ordinary day, but it is certainly not one.

I'm sitting here, reclined in a chair, next to my lovely wife.  She has three fetal monitors, an IV full of yummy dextrose, and a pulseox sensor.  The fetal monitor beeps every once in a while to indicate the Natalie and Kate's heartbeats.  Kate has been particularly bad in this area as she keeps moving around and away from the sensor.

It started earlier today with a yell from Leesa that I can honestly say I hope I never hear again.  I've always maintained that men (most men, anyway) are hardwired with a feature -- a cut-off switch, if you will -- that is tripped when a woman cries.  It's just something that says: "Stop what you're doing right now.  If you're busy, stop.  If you're angry, drop it.  Fix the crying now."  This was something else, though.  It was a mix of fear, anguish, panic, despair, and confusion coming from my beloved.  The kind of thing that goes right to your hindbrain.

It was blood, and lots of it.  The doctor has said it's a partial placental abruption.  Basically, the placenta has come partially loose from the uterus.  Which is bad, but it could be worse - and that's the real danger right now.  She's been admitted and we'll be here for a couple days at least.  Personally I'd feel safer if they just kept her after that until she's full term, but we'll see how it goes.

We certainly appreciate any prayers for us and the girls.  I'll try to keep this up with any status changes when they happen.

 

Says the doctor: "I'm not very good at seeing the sex."  So we know nothing yet.  Next appointment is 12/5 so hopefully we'll know then.  Still, most importantly, babies and mother are just fine.

Today's the day, hopefully.  We hae an appointment in a few hours for an ultrasound and the twins are old enough now that the doctor should be able to tell the sex.  That is, if they'll cooperate.  So there may be some news posted here later today.

A prayer here and there that the ultrasound go well and that the twins are nice and healthy would, as always, be much appreciated.

Sorry, kids.  This is just the beginning...



Highlights:
0:15 - Baby B's heartbeat
1:28 - Baby A apparently planning to conquer the world
3:20 - Baby A's heartbeat
3:45 - Baby B trying to suck its thumb
5:09 - Baby B finally catching its thumb

* Times are from the beginning - click on the clock if it's negative and counting down

As many of you know, recent silence hardly means that nothing is going on.  By no means.  I am thrilled to announce that we are expecting identical twins around the end of March.  No word yet on boys vs. girls but we'll hopefully know next week or soon after.  We would certainly appreciate any prayers as we finally begin this long-awaited phase in our lives.

And, yes, in true Smiling Kevin form, expect to see some new infant creepers to show up in the official store very soon.

So.  Now that that seriousness is out of the way I can feel free again to return you to the regular deluge of navel-gazing writing exercises, bizarre news stories, and hacky political commentary that you love so dearly.